Friday, June 4, 2010

Dream Scene Blogfest!

Thanks, Amalia for hosting this blog fest. My post this time around is something that isn't in something I've written, but it is in the time line. I'll see how much i like it in the morning in order to see if I put it in the story. Otherwise...it remains a scene! But it was fun, if short.

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The garden was brighter than memory, and he could hear his sister's laughter. She was teasing Vynnek. He knew his sister well enough to hang back. He was doing the right thing, letting her marry. Perhaps it was a bit odd that it was his best friend and his sister. Politics did allow for this all the time. Strengthening ties and whatnot. So the ruse would work. and his sister would be happy. That was all that mattered. He couldn't fight smiling.

He rounded the corner and there--

They were dead. The somber soldiers shoveled dirt over their still forms. Then the soldiers paused. The little girl in the dirtied gray dress perched on the edge of her parents' grave. Her young face was impassive. He felt his own features settle in similar lines, and his niece became a mirror. He didn't recognize the face there. It was his, and not. His skin shone Silver. Silver like the magic he used to hide his true self. His real face.

He reached up a hand, meaning to strip it away, but rather than revealing himself, there was nothing. Emptiness. His fingers Scraped silver and found nothing in the mirror. His belly hardened. His breath caught in his throat.

His niece screamed.
Suddenly Kyr was awake and sitting in his bed. Loysa needed him.

12 comments:

  1. oooh, that was scary. The laughter cut short by the scene of death. Very striking scene. I liked the image of the girl on the tombstone and the mirror reavealing nothing. Very creepy. Great post.

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  2. Whoa. That's an awful dream. Such a hopeful moment contrasted with something so grim. I love the image of him trying to strip away the mask but find that there's nothing behind it.

    thanks for participating!

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  3. Oh such sadness in a dream. The contentment then the pain and fear all rolled into one. The mask he hides behind make him feel less than himself. But at least he was certain he knew what the dream was telling him to do.

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  4. Nightmare! I love the way you switch from the bright garden to the grave site and then the little girl's scream that wakes Kyr up. Great bit of writing!

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  5. Scary and sad, this was a very striking scene. Excellent entry for the blogfest. :)

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  6. Scary and the names were very unique. Nice job.

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  7. I like the imagery and the play on memory and dreams, like they were mixed together. Nice job. I adored it :)

    <3 Kelsey Leigh

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  8. Great dream sequence. It was rather creepy and well written to get that point across. Good job.

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  9. Thanks a ton everyone! I guess this means it gets in the manuscript and doesn't have to remain just-a-scene. :D I appreciate it.

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  10. Good imagery and voice. So creepy; convoluted.

    .......dhole

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  11. Very well done! I wanted to keep on reading. I wish more books read this way.

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